The Right Thing
by AdmHawthorne
Summary: Jane and Maura clash about what people should know about them. A little drama and a brunch with Angela ensue. Cowritten with Googlemouth
1. Chapter 1

**Cowritten with Googlemouth. Characters are not ours. They belong to Tess, Janet, TNT, and other important people.**

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><p>Jane rolled over, one arm tucking neatly under her head as she reached blindly across the bed with the other. Much to her supreme comfort and delight, the soft and sleep warmed body of Maura was still curled on her side facing away from the detective. Jane took the opportunity to scoot in closer and wrap her lithe form around the smaller woman, her free hand resting gently on the other woman's stomach.<p>

For a time, they lay quietly together, but the peaceful silence was broken by the sound of Jane's phone.

"She has the worst timing," Jane muttered as she rolled over to answer the call. "Hi, Ma."

"_Jane, are you still asleep? It's 10 o'clock in the morning! You're going to sleep the day away. Maura is already up and gone. I bet she's off doing something interesting like yoga or painting. I don't know why you don't do more things with her. You know she's…"_

"Ma, why are you calling me?" With a grunt of frustration, Jane glanced over to see Maura watching her with an amused expression on her face. "And are you sure Maura even made it _home_ last night? Didn't she have a date or something?"

"_Oh, that's right! She did."_ Angela paused for moment, thinking. _"You know, I don't think she did come home last night. Well, good for her!"_

"Ma! Really?" The blush creeping across the younger Rizzoli's face did not go unnoticed by the doctor, who only smirked more.

"_What? She's a grown woman, and, if she doesn't want to come home after a good date, who am I to judge? Anyway, I didn't call about that. I called to see if you could come over for dinner tonight."_

"That depends," Jane closed her eyes. She could see it coming. "Who are you trying to set me up with this time?"

"_What would make you think I'm trying to set you up? Can't a mother want to have a nice dinner with her daughter and a good friend?"_

"When that mother is you and that daughter is me, no. Come on, Ma. Spill it." The detective sighed, struggling to sit up more in the bed.

"_Okay,__ fine. His name is Dack Costner. He's a real estate agent, and he's really a nice boy."_

"Dack? What kind of name is Dack. It sounds like a bad glue or something."

Beside her, Maura mouthed the name, one delicately sculpted eyebrow arching, and made a face of equal parts humor and bewilderment. Who named a child Dack?

From the other end of the line an exasperated sigh could be heard, followed by an equally exasperated voice. _"His name is Richard, but he goes by Dack. Jane, would it hurt you to come?"_

"Yeah, it might. Forget it, Ma. I told you five months ago that I wasn't doing any more blind dates, and I meant it. I'm off the market." Jane nodded definitively to herself.

"_Just because you haven't found anyone yet doesn't mean you won't. Why are you so set on being an old maid? You just need to put yourself out there, sweetie, that's all. I promise, eventually the right one will come along. Don't give up hope yet."_

"I haven't given up hope, Ma," Jane rolled her eyes. "And I'm not going to be an old maid. I'm actually in…" A sharp jab in her ribcage stopped her abruptly, and she glanced down to give Maura a hard look as the smaller woman began to lose her amusement and look pained, even alarmed. "I'm… work takes up a lot of my time, and the guys you set me up with are just not who I'm interested in dating, okay? Now, can we drop it? You woke me up, and I need to pee."

Angela's voice was dejected. _"Okay, Jane. If you say so, but, if you change your mind…"_

"I won't, but I'll call you if I do. I'll talk to you later. Love you." With another heavy sigh, Jane ended the call and tossed her phone back on the bedside table.

She sat quietly, head in her hands as if she was trying to gather some small reserve of patience that she tucked away for emergencies before calmly turning to the other woman in her bed and quietly saying, "This would be easier if we were just out."

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	2. Chapter 2

Maura waited in silence to see if Jane would, as usual, supply the customary list of 'buts' that she had amassed at the beginning of their relationship. The list, however, did not seem forthcoming, and so Maura offered to start it for her. "_But_ we said we weren't ready to do that. Remember? We weren't going to come out unless – I mean _until_ we were certain that this wasn't just a passing thing for either of us." Her body moved slowly, languidly, as though reluctant to be anywhere but flat on her back. She reached out to stroke Jane's side and lower back, a silent plea to return to her, lie back down, touch her again.

"That was over four months ago. Don't you think it's about time we moved on? I mean, come on, Maura, neither one of us is getting any younger, and, frankly, all this sneaking around is getting old." Jane turned, pulling her body away from Maura's touch. "It's all too complicated, and it doesn't have to be. I'd bet good money that very few people who know us would be upset or even care, and I'm pretty sure Ma would just be happy that I'm dating _someone_. She's convinced I'm going to die alone with just me, my gun, badge, dog, and a bottle of beer." Her voice held a note of pleading. "Please, sweetheart, why don't we just tell people? Is it," the normally confident detective stalled, frowning deeply, a note of fear in her voice, "Is it because you're ashamed to be seen with me in your circle? I know I can embarrass you. But I can learn, Maura. I can change, be a better girlfriend, one you're not so worried will cause an issue with your friends. You've changed for me. Fair is only fair."

"Never," Maura promised fervently as she sat up, heedless of her own nudity. "Don't you _dare_change, Gianetta Regina Rizzoli. If I wanted to be with someone who wouldn't embarrass me in the social circles in which I was reared, I'd date them. I want you. Just you." Again, as ever, she attempted to establish closeness through physical contact. For all her cerebral ways, Maura was a very physical, tactile person. It was the one method of communication that she never got wrong, never misunderstood. "I'm just not sure I'm ready to take this outside here yet. Anyway, why should it be anyone's business? We're not doing this for them. We're doing it solely for ourselves."

Even as she spoke, though, the caramel-haired woman knew that this time, that wouldn't work. Something had been simmering between them lately, some frustration and restlessness within Jane, and within herself, a slow-building fear that she had not even recognized until quite recently. _Exposure._ Though neither of them had breathed a word yet to anyone, already Maura felt naked, as though she had discovered a surveillance camera in her bathroom, a listening device under her pillow. What would it feel like once Jane gave in to this premature impulse and actually started telling people?

"It's not about them; it's about us, Maura." This time, Jane allowed the contact, though she winced slightly. "I want more than a back alley romance. For a little while, it was fine. Slipping around, wondering if we were going to get caught was kind of fun, you know? But, this is our life we're talking about here, and I'm tired of playing games. _I'm_ not ashamed of you, and I'm not afraid of what others might say. I'm past that. I've been past that for a while. I want to be able to hold your hand or give you a kiss hello when we're in public. For once, I've really thought about it. It's not about _them_, so what should it matter if they know or not? Why shouldn't we be able to show at least a little affection with each other when we're not on the clock? Look, I'm not just running out and doing something stupid and hoping for the best later. I'm _telling_ you… _asking_ you to, please, just consider it. I want things; things I can't really have if we have to keep our relationship forever in the dark."

Jane pulled away again and stood, putting on the shirt that had been carelessly thrown to the floor the night before. "I think you should know," she said, voice hoarse with emotion, "The stress of keeping our relationship a secret is getting to me. It gets really hard for me to pretend to be happy whenever someone suggests a date for you or be neutral whenever Ma tries to set me up." She rolled her eyes back, stopping the tears before they had a chance to fall. "There's something to be said about belonging to someone and not being afraid, or ashamed, of people knowing. I'm finally not afraid. I was never ashamed. I just… sometimes I think you only want to claim me when you know no one will know so you don't have to deal with the idea that someone might be offended that I belong to you," she shrugged, "Or you to me. I can't…," with a wave of her hand, she silenced the doctor before she could speak. "Just… just think about it, okay? I'm hitting the bathroom."

With a slump to her shoulders and a heaviness in her stride, Jane left her bedroom and entered the bathroom, closing the door with a gentle click.

Watching her go, Maura's eyes glazed with moisture. She had wanted to argue, wanted to interrupt, but sensed that her girlfriend's state of upset was not to be deterred merely by soft words; and so Jane's reasoning just kept coming, inexorably, logically, rationally. That, she took a moment to acknowledge inwardly, was surprising. Normally, Maura gave facts, logic, and rationality while Jane presented feelings. This time, Jane was being so reasonable, and Maura was the one who had nothing but feelings.

But was that really true?

Maura stood to find and don her nightgown, pull her hair into a ponytail, and make the bed while awaiting her turn in the bathroom. As she did so, she assembled the statistics that she had been collecting over the years, starting with her first crush on another female. Once she was dressed too, once she was armored with a put-together look and felt ready to present the confidence she needed to project, she would do so.

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><p>"First of all," Maura said as she served the coffee, croissants, and fruit she had brought home for their breakfast, "it's no one's business. It's not fair at all that this is the case, but it is a fact: when a woman says she's dating a man, people will think of them going out for movies and dinners, baseball games, holding hands and kissing, and maybe having him over to meet each other's parents. When a woman says she's dating a woman, other people immediately think about the way we have sex. I don't want people thinking that about you, and I don't want them thinking that about me. It's an invasion, and it caters to the worst in certain types of people, particularly certain types of men."<p>

"Who cares?" Jane sipped her coffee, eyes closing. Her body language said she was already tired of the conversation before it had even really gotten started, but she pressed on despite the weariness in her voice. "People are going to think what they're going to think. It doesn't really matter what they're picturing in their heads. I mean, I'm pretty sure that, when I was dating hot guys, people were wondering what I looked like having sex with my boyfriend. That's just the way people are, and you can't keep people from thinking things. It's when you start giving in and hiding because of what someone might think that you lose."

With a shake of her head, Jane set her coffee cup gently down. "Maura, being able to kiss you hello or say I'm taken and be able to say who it is that I'm taken with doesn't cater to anyone. Why should _we_ be any different than a hetero couple? Why should we have to worry about what other people think? When did _you_ start caring? You've always danced to a different beat. That's one of the things I love about you." The dark haired woman took in a deep breath and let it out slowly as she gathered her thoughts. "You say people think about dinner, movies, hand holding, and meeting the parents when they think about straight couples. Well, how do you think that happened? It wasn't because the straight couples were afraid of what people might picture in their heads if they were open about their relationship. _How_ are we _ever_ suppose have that kind of normal life if we act like what we're doing is something less than normal?"

_Fear_. There it was again. She'd brought it up herself, but now as she heard Jane talking about making their lives normal for the majority, Maura regretted having ever mentioned it. "All, right, that's one fair point," she conceded, "but what about your family? Do you really want your father knowing, or thinking he knows, what we get up to together? Your brothers?" She took a deep breath and prepared what she felt should be the _coup de grace_. "What about your mother? She lives in my guest house. Do you want your mother to start harassing us both for grandchildren, now that she knows you've got someone?"

"My father cares about me, but, if Pop doesn't like it, he really doesn't have a lot of room to talk right now. My _brothers_ have been harassing me for ages about which team I bat for. But, it's out of love; they don't really mean anything by it. They've both come to me in private and told me they didn't care either way, and I believe them. As far as Ma goes? Please. She's _already_ pestering me for grandkids. That's not going to change. My family and I are close, Maura. You know that. We really do love each other unconditionally, and they would love you unconditionally as my girlfriend," Jane frowned. "They already love you as my best friend."

Her gaze sharpened, eyes narrowing as she looked into Maura's face, searching for something. "Korsak and Frost won't care. I'm sure of it. Everyone else doesn't matter on my end. What are you afraid of, Maura? Is it your family? Is it your friends? The people at work? What? You know, we could start out by just telling my family and Korsak and Frost. What about that? Let me show you that at least the people who are closest to us _won't care_. We can do this, Maura." She reached a hand across the counter, placing it firmly on the other woman's forearm. "Why won't you let us be normal?"

"_Because I'm not normal!"_Maura howled, fingers turning white as she pressed her flat hand against the table in an effort not to grasp at Jane in desperation. "I've never been normal. This job, this friendship, what people know about us? This is as close to normal as I've ever been. This is the closest I've ever been to being accepted, to having real friends." She huffed a bit with the exertion of all that emotion, before being able to continue.

When she did so, however, the desperation and fear, all too visible up to now, began to morph into anger. "But now that you mention it, yes, I have a family as well, and they will _not_ be pleased. They won't care as much as you think about the fact that you and your family aren't from our set, but my mother will be livid that you're a woman. And my father, well, my father probably won't speak at all. He couldn't even look at me for an entire summer when he caught me kissing Alexis Saunders out by the boat house. That was just kissing! He's going to know there's more to this than kissing, and maybe I don't want my _father_ to be picturing me with my _head_ between your _legs_!"

Jane drew back, face growing hard. It was her detective's mask, and it was the only thing keeping her from immediately lashing out at the hurt Maura had just inflicted on her. In a cool, even voice, she quietly replied, "If all you can think about when you think of our relationship is sex… if you can't consider how we make each other feel outside of the bedroom, how well we work together as a unit, how we feel comforted, protected, appreciated, happy… _loved_ when we're together and not having to worry about keeping up appearances, then maybe I was wrong about what we actually are." She stood, straightening her shirt. Her face became harder, eyes cooling even more as she looked down at the doctor. "You know I have personal rules. I don't do one-night stands. I don't chase after people I know aren't interested, and," she finished her list in a harsh whisper, "I'm _no one's_ booty call. Get out, Maura."

Amygdala and lachrymal glands engaged, Maura's face became blotchier, redder, until finally she overflowed with tears. However, these were different from any she had ever shed in Jane's presence. They were not tears of insecurity, nor were they tears of sadness. No, these tears expressed only anger. Hot, liquid anger poured from her, dripped from her cheeks and chin, marred the green silk of her ruffled blouse. "And I'm not just here for you to display everywhere, so that people will know you can attract a rich, pretty woman. I'm no one's trophy girl." She walked very sedately around Jo Friday, who whimpered underfoot at the unaccustomed tension in her little world, bothering with no belongings other than her purse before walking out the door and letting it close behind her.

Slamming her hand down on the counter, Jane let out a string of curses before calming down enough to realize what had just happened. "_Fuck_." She groaned, looking down at her dog. "I just broke up with Maura."


	3. Chapter 3

"I'm only agreeing to this because my plans changed at the last minute, but don't think I'm going to go all goo goo over Dack, okay?" Jane helped her mother roll the pasta for dinner.

"Okay, okay, I'm just glad you decided to come. I think you'll like him. He's a great guy, and he's been so helpful!" Angela checked the water and then tended the sauce. "If you want, I could ask Maura to come over?"

"No." Jane snapped back before she could stop herself. "No, we decided to have it at my place to keep from bothering her, remember?"

Angela glanced Jane's way the moment her daughter's irritability crackled, but held her questions for a moment. "Okay. The dough looks good but roll that a little thinner. No thicker than your... well, no thicker than _my_ thumb. You got your Nonna Regina's long spidery fingers. Yeah, more like that." She grabbed up the ingredients for the caprese salad and started slicing thick rounds of Roma tomatoes. "So, what's the problem with you and Maura?"

"Nothing." Jane kept her attention on her work. "We're as good as we're ever going to be."

Angela's knife slid cleanly through the tomato in her hand a few more times. "That doesn't sound good, Janie," she finally said as she switched from tomatoes to cheese in her slicing.

Her daughter shrugged, eyes on the dough. "Stuff happens, and you just can't dwell on it, you know?" She finished her task. "That good, or do you need me to roll it out again?"

"It's fine," Angela replied evenly as she made short work of the fresh mozzarella, laying slices of it out on the platter in a sort of sunburst pattern, edges overlapping, rings of red tomato against white cheese. "What stuff happened?"

"Just stuff, and it doesn't matter now anyway. Aren't you going to tell me all about Dack and how wonderful he is? You're falling down on the job." Jane began cutting the pasta to shape. "How am I supposed to find the right guy," her voice was acrid and bitter, "if you don't tell why every guy you set me up with is the perfect fit?"

It took some artistry to arrange the sunburst, artistry and attention, so Angela couldn't spend the whole time staring down her eldest child until Jane spilled whatever was on her mind. She did glance over between every handful of ingredients she spread on the plate, however. "Dack's terrific. You'll find out about him when you have dinner with him. Now, what's eating you? Are you fighting? Whatever it's about, you should go back and make nice. She's the only _girl_you're even friends with. You need her." She grabbed up a handful of fresh basil and began slivering it to sprinkle over the tomato and cheese sunburst.

The front door opened and Frankie strode in, bearing six-packs of beers and soft drinks. There were kisses to cheeks, hugs, and then a promise that he would tidy the living room – code for watching the game, but at least he would probably fluff the couch pillows up first.

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><p>After putting the drinks away, Jane took in a deep breath and let it go, nodding to herself. "Ma, Maura and I… some stuff happened that I don't want to get into. Ever. Let's just say that I don't really have <em>any<em> girls that are my friends right now, but she still cares about you and Tommy, and you'll still have a place to live until you can settle the divorce and find something on your own." She glanced back to Frankie, who was sipping a beer and watching the game. "The fight we had isn't something I can make nice about, okay?"

As Jane spoke, Angela's expression grew forbidding and suspicious all at the same time. "What did you do?" she demanded, arms akimbo, one hand still holding her knife. "You never dropped a friend in all your life, Janie, even when they deserved it, like that nasty Martin Brennan from school. What did you _do_ to each other?"

For a moment, Jane stood and stared at her mother, mouth drawn into a thin line. When she did finally speak, her voice sounded hollow, broken. "We cared too much and not enough," she sighed holding her hand up. "I didn't _do_ anything, and neither did she. We just," she stopped, shaking her head as she ran a hand across her forehead. "I should have known it'd never work out; we're too different." Dropping her hand, she looked back to her mother. "I'm out of chocolate sauce, and I know you're going to want it for that dessert you like to make. Let me go get it. I need to … to… just let me go get some, okay?"

"Frankie," Angela called, though not bothering to look away from her antsy daughter, "go back to the store for some chocolate sauce."

From the couch came a long-suffering sigh, but the younger sibling did as he was asked. "Sure, Ma."

Angela kept her eye on Jane, fixing her to the spot with a gimlet stare until they were alone in the apartment again. "All right. Spill. And I mean it, Jane, don't you leave out a thing."

"Ma, I don't think I can do this. I don't want to… I mean, Maura, she doesn't," at her mother's hard look, Jane finally broke. The months of tension and frustration came pouring out even as she tried to reign in the tears she had yet to shed over the whole situation. "Maura and I've been dating secretly for about five months. This morning, after you called, I asked her why we couldn't be open about things. I wanted to know what she was scared of. Was she ashamed of me? Was it her family? What? But she… she said some things I'd rather not repeat to my mother regarding sex and how people picture us in their head, and I said I refused to just be a booty call, and I told her to leave. She did and told me as she was leaving that she was no one's arm candy."

Jane turned to the door, looking at it as if she were watching the whole scene all over again. "I never said I wanted her to be my arm candy, Ma. I said wanted us to be _normal_. I wanted to be able to hold her hand in public or kiss her hello. I … she's afraid, and I don't know what to do to make her understand that it doesn't matter what other people think about us."

"Ma, please tell me that I wasn't wrong when I told Maura that you don't care about this, about me and her. Please tell me that I wasn't wrong about you because, right now, I really need you." With a crack in her voice, Jane pleaded with eyes to her mother for help. "I don't know what to do."

Angela let out a sigh as she set down her knife, rinsed off her hands, and then pulled her daughter into her ample bosom for a mama-hug of the sort that would end any problem that was too much for ice cream to handle. "Well, this explains a lot," she said with another long, long sigh as she stroked Jane's curly, messy hair off her face and down her back. Her tone was resigned rather than exasperated. "Crap. Nothing ever goes smooth for you, does it? Come on. Sit down and talk to me." She led her tall, emotionally awkward daughter over to the couch, but before she could tug them both to the couch, the doorbell rang. "Oh, Jesus, I forgot about Dack. You want to go lie down in the bedroom for a little bit? I'll be right back."


	4. Chapter 4

It took about ten minutes for Angela to make appropriate excuses, box up some food for Dack to take home, and head back to Jane's room. Her baby, her eldest, the one who made her a mother in the first place, sprawled across the bed, shoes kicked off, hair spread in a tangle all around her head, splayed limbs claiming far more space than her thinness could have ever justified on its own. "Can I sit?" she asked, but it was just a formality, her pleasantly round weight settling beside Jane's slender body before the question was even fully out of her mouth.

"My life is a mess," Jane groaned as she threw one arm across her face, giving a long, drawn out sigh.

Calloused, nurturing hands swept the hair back from Jane's face as Angela did her best to soothe her daughter. "At least that's not new, huh?" she joked gently, nudging Jane in the side with her knuckles. "Look, I don't want to talk out of school, but I'm guessing this wouldn't be a big deal to you if you really thought that you were just a booty call to Maura, right? So you know you're more than that to her. And she knows damn well she's not just some prancing doll that you like to dress up and show off. If she felt like that for real, she'd never have stuck with you. That one's got self-esteem. She'd never let anybody treat her like that. Seems to me," she went on, speaking louder as she got up to get a cold washcloth from the bathroom for Jane's forehead, "you both know it's way bigger than you two just using each other for sex or an ego boost. Right?"

Jane answered by way of a grunt as she allowed her mother to baby her, closing her eyes against the coolness of the washcloth. "I just want to be with her, Ma, and I don't want to have to worry about what other people think, but she's worried, and, for Maura, that's weird. You know how she is. She doesn't care what other people think. She does what she knows is right, and that's that. So, what is it that's so _wrong_ about me? Or us? Or whatever it is that made her so whatever she is? Is she scared?" Jane gently brushed her mother's hand away, pulling the cloth from her face. "Ashamed? Afraid? Embarrassed? What? She's the only person in my life that I've never been able to completely understand." She closed her eyes against her internal frustration. "_What's wrong with me, Ma?_ What can I do to fix it so she won't feel that way anymore and we _can_ be normal?"

"I don't know, baby girl," Angela sighed as she dabbed away the half-dried traces of crying and lay the cloth over Jane's forehead. "I don't know what's going on with her, but I know a better way to find out than by saying mean things to each other and getting mad. You have to go talk to Maura. Find out what's really eating her. And look, did you tell her you were breaking up? Did you tell her you weren't friends anymore?"

"No," came the murmured response from beneath the washcloth.

"Then for the love of God, don't. Her being so awkward, might be a bit of a blessing right now. She might not know what a breakup looks like if you don't actually _say_ you're breaking up." From the living room, one could hear the sound of the door opening and Frankie's voice calling out to announce chocolate sauce hunting success. "Take a few minutes, then wash your face and let's have dinner. Once you're fed, you'll feel stronger. Then you can go over there and try to patch things up."


	5. Chapter 5

In faded jeans, red t-shirt, tennis shoes, and her customary ponytail to go with the outfit, Jane stood at Maura's front door. The duffle bag slung over her shoulder dug into the muscles as she shifted her weight and tried to figure out if being at Maura's door was the right place to be.

She'd been here, in this mind frame, once before. Hoyt had an apprentice, and Maura's home had become Jane's safe place. Since that time, both Maura and her home had become so much more than a safe place, and the uncertainty creeping up Jane's back and causing her hands to shake was one she thought she'd long ago left behind.

Was she good enough to even be friends with this mysterious and impressive person that lived behind this door?

She wasn't sure. She wasn't sure then as she waited to see if Maura would answer the door and let her in, away from the crazy chaos of the outside world, and she wasn't sure now as she raised her hand and knocked on the door.

When the door opened, Jane said the first thing to come to her mind, "Why do you always have to look like you're about to do a photoshoot?"

Maura looked at her in sad puzzlement, then stepped back in silence to let Jane inside.

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><p>Without a word, Maura walked towards the kitchen to fetch a cold beer and pour herself a glass of wine. Only when handing Jane her dark amber bottle did she ask, "Did you come to talk, or to get your things?"<p>

"Talk." Jane set the beer down on a coaster on the kitchen island and let the duffle bag slide to the ground behind her. "I want to understand, and I don't want to push you away. I'm sorry I said what I did. I know you don't treat me like that, and I know you know I don't treat you like that." She leaned against the counter, willing herself to remain calm. "Will you talk to me? Will you tell me why? What's going on in you head that's making you run away from me?"

"No," Maura replied, but after a deep breath, she amended her statement. "Not until I apologize to you. Jane, I am _so_, so sorry. I know you don't think I'm just a thing. I know you don't think I'm just arm jewelry to make you look good, or a toy to make you orgasm, or an open wallet, or any of that. I said those things to hurt you, and it was unfair and wrong of me. I don't deserve to be forgiven for it, but I hope you will forgive me anyway, because I don't want to lose my best friend or my lover."

"I don't either," a frown crossing her features, Jane clasped her hands together in front of her. "We both said things we probably shouldn't have. That happens sometimes. We've done it before." She gave a small smirk. "We'll probably do it again. So let's not worry about that, okay?" At Maura's nod, Jane's smirk morphed into a small but sad smile. "But I _do_ want to understand. I _need_ to know _why_, Maura. Why is it that you want to keep us from being able to be a full-fledged couple as opposed to whatever it is we are? I care about you, and I really don't care who knows, but I know you do. I can _try_ to stomp this down… this want I have to be able to hold you in a crowded theater when you're cold or pet you when you're having a bad day at work …if I can just understand _why_. Can you at least give me that much? Whatever you need, whatever you want, I can get it or do it, but, this time, I _need to know why_."


	6. Chapter 6

"I want," Maura began, and then broke off with a smile, shyer than she had been in a long time. "Did you just say, whatever you want, I can get it?" Jane nodded, an eyebrow quirked. Maura's head shook in wry fondness. "I wish you could, but knowing you want to... that makes me feel good right now. Thank you." She could not quite manage a smirk in return, but at least her expression bore its customary affection, rather than the mask of alarm and hurt she had worn earlier.

She sipped her wine, then simply swallowed the rest of the glassful before setting it down. "What I want is to do my job without people speculating about me, but I suppose that's not possible, since people have always speculated about me. What I want is to live my life, _our_life, without anyone feeling the need to tell me their religions' views on it. I want to believe that your family will accept you, and me, and us. I wish I could believe that mine would, too, but frankly, your family is much more likely. But I also want your cop family to back you up. There were two deaths last year, one on the north side and one on the south side, of openly gay police officers whose police brothers didn't show up in time to help them when they were needed. I don't want to think that could happen to you, Jane. You already get harassed for what people don't know, and it would only get worse if they were certain instead of just... mostly joking." She edged nearer, hand on the countertop sneaking towards Jane without her directing it.

"But mostly," she concluded, "I'm scared of Charles Hoyt having yet another thing about you that will make him able to hurt you in a new way. Scare you and damage you in a new way. I could be leverage against you, Jane. I could be... I know what I would do to protect you, and I'm not so socially inept that I can't tell you'd do things to protect that are equally against your code of ethics. The things he or his apprentices could make you do... I don't ever want you to have to face the choice between doing those things and not doing them."

Jane's face warred between affection for the woman beside her and irritation at the illogical logic stream Maura was feeding her. "It's too late for that. He already knows how important you are to me. He knew the moment he laid eyes on you in that interrogation room. We all saw the tapes. He _knows_, Maura. Whether we're out as a couple or not, Hoyt knows he could use you as leverage, but what he doesn't know could hurt him. I wouldn't have to say anything for your own family backup to show up. Your biological father still has connections on the inside. I know you're safe. I don't like him, and I don't like how your safety is assured, but I do like knowing that it is."

"And my 'brothers in blue'?" Jane gave a harsh chuckle, "They have their own double standards. Gay men are not okay. Lesbians are fine. We're just one of the guys. I've seen it happen before to others that have come out. Yeah, a few are going to harass me, but I can handle it just like I always have. But," she sighed heavily, "I can't do anything about Bible thumpers or anyone else who wants to get in our face about how they think we should live our lives. The only thing I can tell you is that I know you, and I know that you would smack them down just as hard as they tried to smack you down, and you'd win. Sometimes, that's what matters."

Gaze falling to the floor, the taller woman slouched even more, coming almost to the height of the shorter woman beside her. "We're never going to be out as a couple, are we? We're forever going to be afraid we might be found out, aren't we?" She closed her eyes, face taut, as she whispered mostly to herself, "What a life."

Maura's eyes closed as she took a cleansing breath as taught in yoga, slowly in through the nose, slowly out through the mouth. She climbed down from her barstool and took the step and a half to stand beside Jane's. "I don't want you to feel like you feel right now. I don't want to feel like I feel right now, either. I want to be able to tell you with my whole heart that someday soon I won't care, and I won't be afraid. I want to take you to events and introduce you to everyone as my lover. I want pictures of you everywhere in my house and on my desk. Pictures of _us_. I want to hear your mother harass me for grandchildren as much as she harasses you, and I want to actually have to think about whether I want to give them to her. I want to kiss you under the mistletoe at the wildly misnamed 'non-denominational holiday party' at the precinct." Her lips pressed together as her eyes drifted upward in a futile attempt to keep from spilling. "I'm just… I'm _frightened_. Can you just... Can I have just a little more time before you give up on me? Please?"

Jane's eyes remained on the floor, hands still clasped in front of her. "Ma's at my apartment. She's staying there tonight because… who knows? It's Ma. I don't want to deal with her and all that craziness." She raised her eyes to meet the other woman's. "Would it be okay if I stayed here tonight?" Stepping back, she picked up the duffle bag. "I promise you won't even know I'm here. I'll take up a little corner of the couch or the guest room or something." She gave a gentle shrug.

"I've told you before," Maura said after a long moment's quiet, "there is no part of me or my house to which you're not welcome. That's still true. I still want you with me; that hasn't changed. I hope you will always consider this your home, even if you feel the guest room is... better than being with me."

The detective sighed. "Nothing is better than being with you," the words were out of her mouth and her hands were holding Maura's before she knew she was doing it. "I just… Maura, I don't know what to do with myself. I feel like we're in some kind of weird limbo." Contorting her face in frustration, Jane guided Maura along with her, turning out lights as they went. When they made it to the master bedroom, Jane stopped just inside the doorframe. "You need to know something, and I need to tell you before you decide I still belong there," she pointed to the bed and then slowly turned to Maura. "I broke down today," she shifted the duffle bag on her shoulder. "I mean I completely broke down. Crying, whining, the whole bit… to Ma… who now knows." She held her breath and clutched with both hands to the strap of her duffle bag as she waited to see what would happen next.


	7. Chapter 7

Maura's hands flew to her face to cover her startled "_Oh_" in an almost prayerful pose of rapidly-rediscovered fear. _Smarter people use bigger words to express their emotions,_ she had said more than once – not to chastise Jane for her use of blue language, which secretly amused her, but to explain why she didn't use it herself. Perhaps that was why it was such a shock when the first word out of those pretty lips was mild, softly whispered, but still profane. "Oh, _shit_."

Silence.

A groan.

Fingers spread apart to cup and cover Maura's entire, reddening face. Little huffs emitted from between those hands as her shoulders shook. When her hands parted and she could look up at Jane, the unthinkable was happening.

Maura Isles was laughing.

Jane raised an eyebrow at the word that fell from Maura's lips, but said nothing of it. Instead, she tilted her head to the side and watched the other woman for a moment. "Not what I was expecting," she said as she let out the breath she was holding, "But I'll take it." She smiled in response to Maura's laughter and took her hand to lead her to the bed. With one hand, she guided Maura. "Sit." With the other she set her duffle bag on the bed. "I brought you something… assuming your laughing means you're okay with Ma knowing and not that you've cracked and I'm going to have to lock you up in a straitjacket somewhere."

One hand flailed out until it found Jane's arm and held on, while the other pressed to her own heart as she let her laughter peal out to fill the house. "Jane! Don't you see? I just _understood_ something _social_! Something you didn't have to tell me! Listen, listen, listen." Now her hands were fluttering excitedly without direction at all. "You came here and wanted to talk to me. But you didn't tell me about your mother until just now!" Her speech came rapidly, breathlessly, as all synapses began firing almost too rapidly for her vocal mechanism to keep up with the words she wanted to use. "That means she didn't disown you, because if she had, you would have started with that. You'd have told me I was right. You didn't! Which means," one hand spiraled upward towards the inevitable conclusion, "she approves! She doesn't want to disown you, and she doesn't hate me, and we're _out_ to her, Jane! We can be truthful with Angela! We have a _confidante_!" Overwhelmed, she could do nothing more than throw her arms around Jane's hips as the taller woman stood by the bed, face pressing into the side of her pelvis. "Thank you, Jane, thank you so much."

"Yeah," came the slow and uncertain response. "You're welcome." Maneuvering around Maura's surprisingly tight grasp, Jane dug in the duffle bag as she told Maura what happened. When she was done, she pulled back from the hold Maura had on her, a gift wrapped box in her hands. "So, Ma clearly doesn't care, but she's pretty concerned about how we're going to do as a couple right now. I'm glad you're okay with this." She held the box up. "This is for you."


	8. Chapter 8

It took Maura a long moment to rein herself in enough to let go of Jane, and another moment to understand that there was an object being handed to her, a box is about 9x9x4, prettily wrapped, enough that she suspected a professional had done it. Uncomprehending hands clasped the box, held it, and wide eyes lifted towards Jane's face. "Me? You brought me a present, after...?" Another long moment later, she finally let her fingers slip beneath an edge of wrapping paper and gingerly pry open the tape that held it closed.

"Oh, Jane. Jane, it's beautiful." The paper nicely folded by Maura's side on the bed, the lid off the box, revealed that the box held a stuffed bear – very well cared for, but clearly an antique. Again, hazel eyes sought out chocolate ones. "What does this mean to you?"

"A promise," Jane set the bag down on the ground and sat on the edge of the bed beside Maura. "It's been passed down through a few generations, about five I think, in my family on the Rizzoli side. When I was a kid, Nonna gave it to me. Ma would never let me play with it, though. She said it was too old, and I'd break it or something. One day, Nonna came over and she wanted to know why I wasn't playing with my bear, and I told her." Jane smiled warmly at the memory. "She took me upstairs, pulled the bear down from the shelf Ma had it on, and handed it to me. She said that teddy bears were protectors of little girls, and she had given her protector to me because she knew that, even if I didn't want to admit it out loud, I needed a protector. . I told her I was big girl. She said that even big girls are sometimes little girls and who need protecting and that this teddy bear," she gave it a fond pet to the head, "had been doing the job just fine for generations."

A bittersweet smile crept across Jane's face. "Nonna said not to worry if I hurt him because he could be mended. She knew because she had fixed him a lot herself. He was a protector of Rizzoli women, and he would always be there if I needed him, and Ma should know better than to try to keep such a fierce protector away from the ones he's watching out after." She laughed. "Then, she took the bear," Jane took the bear gently from Maura's hands, "Made a little roaring sound," she made the sound for Teddy, "and kissed me on the cheek." She kissed Maura on the cheek.

"I can't always be around when you're scared, but," she laid the bear back in Maura's hands. "He can. It's what he does. He helps with our fears because he's a protector of Rizzoli women."

Wide eyes flicked down towards the toy bear, and then tender, gentle fingers examined its fur, its stitching, the glass eyes, the leather-wrapped button of a nose, replaced several times, no doubt, but always with good quality things rather than plastic substitutes. "Five generations of Rizzoli women," Maura repeated, impressed and touched. "Your little hands held this bear." She reached for one of those hands to kiss it, larger now, but just as dear to her and more than if she had known Jane from the time that that stuffed toy would have looked large to both of them. "This bear must have absorbed so many of your tears." Experimentally, she cuddled the aged toy to her chest. "How about that. It works."

She smiled. "I feel safe."

Jane nodded. "He's good like that." They chuckled. "Listen, Maura, I don't want to push you into something you're not ready for. I care about you too much for that, but, if you're scared, you know I'll be here with you the whole time. We'll go through this together, and," she reached out to give another affectionate pat to the little bear's head, "Teddy will protect us when we don't think we can handle it anymore. He knows we can handle anything. He's got unconditional faith because he knows we're too awesome to let fear keep us from doing what we think is the right thing to do." Giving a wink, Jane leaned over and laid a gentle kiss on Maura's forehead.

Cradling the bear to her, Maura sighed. "I know what the right thing is. I've always been good at that. It's just usually so much easier to _do_ the right thing than it is now." She set Teddy down more gently than she would normally treat an inanimate object, even patting its little round belly, then turned back to re-embrace her lover. "We will do it, though. I promise, love. Maybe we could start by taking your mother to brunch and seeing if I can deal with having her look at us together?"

"I would like that. She's expecting me to call her tonight to let her know how things went with us. Want me to set it up for tomorrow morning?" Jane wrapped a protective arm around the small woman, pulling her in tight to her side. "Whatever you need, Sweetheart."

"Tomorrow morning," Maura agreed a little too easily, then had to take another cleansing breath. This time, it helped. "Tomorrow morning."


	9. Chapter 9

Maura had wanted them all to go to one of her favored, though not often visited, brunch locations, which meant they would all have to dress nicer than if they had just gone to the local diner. Though she normally would have objected, Jane recognized that Maura needed to feel comfortable in some aspect of what they were about to do, and, if that meant having to go to a classy place for brunch, then Jane was willing to go with it.

Jane checked herself in the mirror for the hundredth time to make sure she looked absolutely presentable. Wearing a pressed pair of well fitted black slacks, heeled and shined black dress boots, a belt she knew Maura loved on her, and a fitted Oxford shirt, she felt like she was going to work rather than brunch. However, she had bothered to do her hair and apply some light makeup, which wasn't the norm for a workday.

She straightened her cuffs, fluffed her hair, stared herself down in the mirror to psych herself up, and then stepped out to find the doctor.

"Maura?" Jane walked back into the master bedroom. "Sweetheart, are you almost ready to go? We still have to go pick up Ma at my place, and you know how long she can take. Maura? Where are you? Are you still in the closet? Come on! We're going to be late."

"What?" called back the fashionista from the back of the walk-in. "I can't hear you! I'm in the closet!"

"Not for long, sweetheart," Jane mumbled to herself with a satisfied smirk, then raised her voice to call back, "Then come out already!"

Thereupon, Maura appeared, still putting in her earrings. "Relax, Jane. We've got a whole hour before _Estelle's_opens for brunch." She slipped on her shoes, raising her almost to Jane's height – or rather, what had been Jane's height before Jane herself put on her dress boots – and stood up straight, nervousness leaking off her like fog out of a walk-in freezer's open door. "How do I look?"

In short, Maura looked well worth the money she'd undoubtedly spent on the outfit. It was a sheath dress of delicate green, the cut of which emphasized her ample curves. To set it off, she had donned hot fuchsia slingbacks which, as she had once claimed, were what being a woman on a date was all about, a necklace and earrings of sparkling platinum, and a collection of bangles in addition to her chunky Cartier wristwatch. On anyone else, it would be an outfit of extraordinary beauty. On her, it was a casual outfit for a pleasant excursion with an LLBFF and the LLBFF's mother, unremarkable in any way, and perhaps that was the point: to turn this outing, as it were, into a non-event.

"Amazing as usual." Jane offered her arm. "Are you ready for this? Ma's been texting me for half an hour now. She's been dying to go to _Estelle's_ for a while now. You made her day when you suggested it. I just hope she doesn't embarrass us and put a scone in her purse for later or something."

Maura giggled as she took the proffered arm and followed Jane out to her car. "I hope she does."

* * *

><p>"Welcome to <em>Estelle's<em>. My name is Bertrand, and I'll be your server today. May I start you lovely ladies off with something to drink? Coffee, tea, or maybe," he leaned in as if telling an amusing secret, "a mimosa or bloody Mary?"

Maura glanced towards Angela before deciding, "I'd appreciate both a mimosa and an iced tea with lemon, please. Angela? Jane?"

"Actually, water?" Jane shifted in her seat, hand closest to Maura resting on the table between them. "With lime, not lemon."

"She's allergic," Angela said, ignoring her daughter's dirty look, before smiling broadly and cheerfully ordering a mimosa and water.

When the server left to fill the drink orders, Jane gave a little nervous smile, cleared her throat, and tried for normal. "How'd you sleep last night, Ma? I think I changed the sheets on my bed recently," she winced as she thought about it. "Well, relatively recently anyway."

"Like a baby, even though you really need new pillows. Maybe I'll get you some for Christmas, if you still need them," Angela replied as she examined the restaurant's real silverware with a failed attempt at discretion. "You don't know what a weight is off my mind! You brought home a good one, Janie." She reached over to pat Maura's hand warmly, much to the medical examiner's surprise. "So, how are the scones here?"

"They're delicious," Maura answered after a moment to switch gears, shifting back from surprised lesbian lover of this woman's daughter to brunch connoisseur. "The savory ones are very flavorful with just a little butter, and the sweet ones go very nicely with fresh berries and Devonshire cream, which _Estelle's_always has in stock. Oh, look, here's Bertrand."

Indeed, there he was, his beautiful, willowy, graceful arm holding up a tray full of drinks and additions. "Here we are, mesdames," he said, barely bothering with a French accent, as if just using the vocabulary as a kind of joke. "One mimosa, one mimosa and an iced tea, one water with lime twist. Now, I'll just tell you that for brunch today we have some specials..." He gave a brief synopsis, in addition to the menus that had been on the table. "Does any of that sound appetizing, or would you like to take some more time?"

"Well," again Jane shifted uncomfortably at the table, the hand resting on the table's top between her and Maura flexing slightly, "I'm not sure." She glanced to the honey brunette for help. "Sweetheart, I'm okay if you just want to order for both of us. You're better with knowing this stuff than I am."

Angela's brows lifted. "You know, the man's supposed to do that," she began, but had the grace to blush as she realized what she'd said. "I mean, not that... Um... How do you decide?"

This, Maura could answer, albeit with a little hesitancy, and to the quiet amusement of Bertrand. "There isn't a man involved. Let me see. I think we should share a scone plate for three, both savory and sweet, with the spreads and fruits on the side. My," she licked her lips to give herself time to think, both of the order and of what to call Jane, "my girlfriend, I think, would also enjoy two eggs over-medium and some sausage. Patties, please, not links. How does that sound, Jane?" One hand slipped to the side to rest on the taller woman's strong, warm thigh, partly to steady herself and partly to make certain that the important part of what she'd said didn't go unnoticed, now that she'd brought herself to say it at all.

Jane simply nodded her approval, smiling gently at her girlfriend.

The ceiling fan did not fall from the ceiling onto Maura's head. The other patrons of _Estelle's_did not swivel in their seats to stare. No airplane crashed through the atrium window. Bertrand did not bat a lash. "Thank you. And for madame?" He looked expectantly to Angela.

"I'd like the sausage too, please, but no eggs," she answered, smiling her thanks. Bertrand repeated the order succinctly, having had no need to write it down, and betook himself back to the kitchen to submit it. The moment he was gone, but not quite out of earshot most likely, Angela leaned towards Maura. "Good for you."

Jane blushed. "Ma," she started by way of distracting from the fact that she was blushing at finally being claimed in public by Maura, "I cannot believe you. 'Usually the man decides.' Really? Thinking that one of us is the guy is like thinking one chopstick in a pair is the fork."

"Okay, yeah, I guess that was kind of dumb, huh?" Angela agreed, chuckling.

Jane snorted, blush still rising on her face. "Besides, we all know I'm the guy. It's just that, you know, I'm dating a matriarch." She glanced over to Maura as she moved the hand on the table down to place it atop the one resting on her thigh.

Though shy on the subject, Maura took courage and suggested, "But now that you've said that, it occurs to me that you might have some questions for us. Obviously there are going to be details that Jane would be uncomfortable with us discussing," not to mention her own potential for discomfort, "but as her mother, you deserve to have some questions answered, if you have any."

Angela sipped her mimosa as she gave the offer some thought. "You know, I've always wondered," she began, her voice light and airy.

"Oh, God," Jane mumbled.

The elder Rizzoli ignored her daughter, "How do you figure out which one is going to do stuff that is normally the man's job or the woman's job? Do you flip a coin or decided based on which one of you is more butch or what? Did I say that right? Butch?" She looked at Jane.

"Why didn't I order a whisky on the rocks?" Jane mumbled under her breath before answering, "Yeah, some people say butch."

"Okay then, is it a butch versus girly thing or something? Is that how you figure out who's going to do what? Of course," Angela was rambling, letting her thoughts come out sans filter, "if you're in the bedroom, you probably don't have any clothes on anyway, so how do you figure it out then?"

"Oh my God!" Jane covered her face with her free hand, blush darkening her features.

Much to no one's surprise at all, Maura took the questions seriously. "It depends on who's more suited to the task. For instance, Jane grew up with her father, so she's better with smaller plumbing crises than I am. When her car needs a little help before she can drive it to the mechanic, I usually take care of it, because the intricacies of the internal combustion engine are one of my hobbies. I cook a wider variety of foods, but Jane's touch with Italian cuisine is quite a bit better than mine, and she cooks more naturally than I do. I require recipes, but Jane has instincts. In terms of lovemaking, we..."

Panic surged through Jane. "No." She quickly pulled her hand from Maura's and clasped it over the doctor's mouth. In a stern, low, quiet voice, she said to both women, "You two can talk about whatever you want _as long as_ there are _no specifics_ about what we do in the bedroom. No, Maura. I mean it. There are limits on what I'm okay with my mother knowing, and who is on top… and when …crosses into the things-Ma-should-never-know category. Got it?"

Maura nodded as best she could, though she still looked confused.

Jane looked to her mother, who was quietly chuckling at the scene; she nodded to her daughter who then continued on. "I'm going to remove my hand, and, when I do, if you start to talk about our bedroom stuff again, I'll… I'll," she grimaced, thinking of the right threat. Then, she smirked, eyes going to a dare. "I'll kiss you here and now to shut you up. I mean it."

With that, Jane slowly removed her hand, eyes narrowed in unspoken threat.

"Kissing your girlfriend in public isn't much of a threat, is it?" Angela lightly scolded. "Shouldn't you threaten her with getting your hair cut into a mullet or something? Isn't that what you people wear for hair-do's? Mullets?" She winked from behind her mimosa glass at Maura's horrified expression.

"_You people?_" Jane scoffed. "_Really?_"

Immediately, however, Maura rose to the bait. "I would _never_ permit my hair to be styled in such an atrocious, outdated manner, and I would be severely skeptical that Jane would ever do such a thing, either. Though her fashion sense leaves something to be desired, Jane does appreciate things such as taste, current style, and her own type of beauty, and I'm certain she realizes that while 'party in back' suits her very well, 'business in front' is _not_ an appropriate way to offset her strong, fine features. Besides all that, there are fourteen hairstyles that are considered lesbian hairstyles, other than the distasteful one referred to as the mullet, and I'm confident that if Jane sought a change in her hairstyle, she would pick one of those. Something much more complementary to her face. Not that she would, or should, of course. Jane looks perfectly gorgeous exactly as she is."

"I think you're pretty, too," Jane said as she smirked at her mother. The _I see what you did there_ look she gave the older woman came with a chuckle from the detective. "Relax, Sweetheart, Ma's just yanking your chain. Right, Ma?"

"Mostly," Angela shrugged, "But I do think you'd look cute with a short little shag. Wouldn't she look good shagged, Maura?" Angela barely kept her grin contained as she set her mimosa glass down on the table top.

"One of these days, Ma," Jane cleared her throat, sighing.

Maura brightened as she found something she could discuss. "Did you know that the word shag refers to a style of haircut, a style of carpet, and also to sexual intercourse? The last is British slang, though I am uncertain of the slang term's derivation. Possibly it relates to the carpet style, with the implication that to shag would be to have intercourse on the carpet. On the floor, that is. Uncomfortable and a bit on the _informal_ side, if you see what I mean," her hand lifted to indicate a certain shiftiness and insinuation, buoyed by her vocal tone. "Speaking of which, Jane …"

"What did I _just_ tell you two?" Jane slid down in her chair. "First of all, I'm pretty sure that the British slang is probably more based off the fact that some people's slang for," she stopped herself, rolled her eyes, and groaned. "I can't believe I'm saying this out loud and in front of my mother." She glanced around to make certain no one was listening and no one was coming. "I'm pretty sure it's based off the fact that the term _carpet_ is slang for a woman's … private parts." She cleared her throat as she rolled her eyes. "Second of all," she grunted, "Ma, stop teasing Maura. You know she doesn't always catch it, and you talking about my sex life is just wrong and weird and makes me feel like I need to go take a shower or something, and, finally," she turned to fully face Maura, "I told you, Sweetheart, that I would kiss you here and now if you did that again, so…"

Without any additional warning, Jane's hand shot out, landed on Maura's neck, and pulled the smaller woman to her as she leaned in and kissed the doctor.


	10. Chapter 10

It was right out of a sitcom. Maura yelped out a quick "Not here!" that was just a little too loud as her hands flailed to try and regain her balance and pull her back into her own chair. Angela barked out with laughter as the flailing died down, replaced by increasingly obvious enjoyment. By the time Jane released her with a self-satisfied grin, the hazel eyes were wide and dark, and Maura was all but fluttering.

"Your meal, ladies," came Bertrand's voice, modulated to indicate both amusement and a certainty that it was not his place to be amused. Not that it was stopping him.

"Um," Maura replied, thumb dragging lightly over her bottom lip to remove excess moisture. "Um."

"She means thank you," Angela clarified, grinning like she'd engineered the whole thing herself, which, of course, she had.

"Also," Jane added, eyes still sparkling with accomplishment, "can I get cosmo?" She smirked as she watched Berrtrand place dishes on the table.

"Oh, that sounds good! Can I have one, too?" Angela said then turned to the still dazed doctor. "Maura, do you want another mimosa? Maura?" She chuckled and reached a hand across the table to give the young woman a gentle pat. "Sweetie, you need to breathe."

As it so often was lately, Maura's hand was pressed to her chest as she attempted to calm her breathing, nodding acknowledgement of Angela at the suggestion. "Yes. I mean, no. No more alcohol for me, thank you, Bertrand." The fellow disappeared to fetch the other two drinks. "Wow. I... Wow." Surreptitiously she glanced around to see if there were reactions from the other patrons. There were none, other than a little gentle amusement from a pair of older gentlemen who, she now noticed, were holding hands across their table. "Nothing happened."

"What? You were expecting a herd of men to come and haul you off or something?" Angela gave the honey brunette a disapproving look as she picked up a scone to butter. "Maura, we're in _Boston_. Same sex marriage is legal here. Besides, as long as you two are happy, and you treat my Janie right, then who cares?"

Smiling gently, Jane leaned over to whisper into Maura's ear, "See? Told you." With a quick kiss to the blushing cheek of her girlfriend, she leaned back into her seat and picked up her knife and fork to attack her eggs. "I think you over think things sometimes, Sweetheart. Bite of eggs?"

"It's just," Maura began, "a bit surprising, and alarming. I've always been very private about this, other than in specific settings and company. I compartmentalize well. But Jane is right; I don't ever want her to think that I'm ashamed to love her. I just... I have some things that I haven't been very good at leaving in the past, and some things that I really hope won't intrude on the present or the... _our_ future. Whatever that may be." Then she simply opened her mouth to receive a bite of egg, then reached for a scone to slather with Devonshire cream and cover with strawberries.

"It's okay," Jane said absentmindedly as she attacked a sausage. "Teddy and I have your back."

"Oh my God, you gave her Teddy?" Angela's voice practically squeaked. "When are you two moving in together?"

Eyes bulging, Jane hissed out, "Ma!"

Maura's eyes widened as well, but it took her a long moment to chew her bite of scone, and longer still to cough the crumbs out of her windpipe. Once she could speak properly again, the diminutive woman hurried to explain, "No, no, no, Jane didn't _give_ me Teddy. She just brought him to our, I mean, _my_ house. To borrow, until I didn't feel so scared of letting other people know. I didn't presume anything of the kind. That is, I hope... but no, we haven't discussed that at all. Not that I wouldn't..." Uncertainty marred her explanation, and she gazed pleadingly at Jane to help settle it for her.

"Ma, stop trying to get us married before we're even out to anyone, and _don't help us_," Jane pointed at her mother, who held a hand up in innocence. "This is hard enough for Maura withoy you meddling. God, you're so… I mean, how can you even… Man," she growled in frustration. "It'll be _months_ before we move in together. I mean," clearly shocked at her own words, Jane tried back peddling. "I mean _when_ we discuss the possibility and _if_ we decide we want to, it'll be months." She cleared her throat and glanced around. "Where's our waiter with my cosmo?"

"Have you two picked out new furniture, or is Jane okay with what you already have?" Angela deadpanned before taking a peaceful bite of scone.

Maura nodded, on firmer footing for a few moments, at least, as Bertrand appeared only a few seconds behind cue, to present them with additional drinks, remove empty glassware, and vanish again. She'd expected the sex questions, and was prepared to answer those, though Jane's threat and subsequent follow-through did make her think twice about that. She'd prepared for the 'lesbian society' and 'gay culture' questions as well. But Maura had never realized that Angela would be so unfazed by the situation that she would leap into the apparently automatic home-sharing, marriage, and babies questions. At least, not right away. Not within the first few years.

But Jane would defend her from them. Jane and... Maura absently reached down into her oversized purse, a lovely Coach handbag, to run her fingers over Teddy's soft, ancient fur. "I'd be happy to replace any furniture you don't like," she offered quietly, "if you wanted."

"Really?" Jane's surprised face only made her mother chuckle more. "I… well, I mean we have such different styles, Maura. What did you call my place? A man cave? Maybe if you just gave me the guest room to do something with so I had my own space? You sense of style is better than mine, and I don't think I'd want to mess up the vibe you have in your house."

"I give you three months, tops," Angela quietly commented, mostly to herself, as she finished the last of her eggs. "Jane, why don't you bring over your leather pieces and replace the side chairs in Maura's living room? You know, sort of mix your styles together? Would that work?"

The dark haired brunette considered it for a moment. "Maybe, but I don't know if the browns would match because… _dammit, Ma!_ Stop. It." She glared at her mother.

"What? I'm only trying to help!"

"I think it's a good idea," Maura replied, subdued and hesitant again, from behind her half-eaten scone. "I don't think your beautiful leather should be hidden away in the back of the house. You love those things. And that stunning antique lamp that your maternal great-great-grandmother brought from Italy. I've actually tried to locate something similar to it, and I can't lay hands on one. It's special to you. My things are pretty, but I didn't choose many of them myself. My decorator picked everything. They're attractive, but nothing I own really means anything, except the artwork in the master bedroom, and the guest bed. And, you know, the guest bed is only special because that's where…"

Jane gave a little cough, glancing up with a guilty expression toward her mother. "Right." She frowned at her mother's knowing look. "How about we talk about it later? I mean, we've got bigger things to tackle first, like who else gets to know about us and in what order. After that, we'll figure out the rest. Okay?" She looked from Angela to Maura.

"Okay," Maura agreed, more content now that there was a definite course of action prescribed. She did so love a plan.

"I'm here for whatever you two need. All you have to do is tell me, and, if your brothers give you a hard time about it, I'll put them back in line." With a nod, Angela picked up her glass. "They know better than to turn against family."


	11. Chapter 11

"Ma, no. I'll… yeah, okay. I'll tell her when I see her. What? No! Of course not, we're," Jane glanced up as she walked into the bullpen to see Korsak and Frost watching her. "It's fine. Look, I'm at work now, and I… yeah. I said yes! I'll tell her, okay? Yeah, I love you, too." With a frustrated grunt, Jane plopped into her chair, ignoring the amused looks on the men's faces.

It had been almost three weeks since their brunch with Angela, and, although they hadn't told anyone else, Jane was pretty sure her mother was making enough fuss for everyone else. She was constantly calling or texting to tell Jane to tell Maura something or the other or pestering Maura about where Jane could put something 'when they moved in together'.

It was starting to all wear kind of thin on the young detective's nerves.

After checking her email and glancing through the folders on her desk, she finally said something to her partner. "Frost, where are you hiding the results of the Trovosky case? You been accidentally feeding the shredder again?"

"Don't blame Barry," came a cheerful, feminine voice as Maura entered the bullpen, silk Hermes scarf fluttering like a lovesick butterfly out from where it was tied about her head like women used to do in the 1950s while driving convertible automobiles. "I just wanted to slip the results from tox and fibers into it." So saying, she went around like Santa Claus, delivering several files to those who had requested them. She didn't have to do that; there was interoffice mail, and there were interns. However, Dr. Isles didn't like to spend her entire day in the lower basement of the precinct, in rooms without windows. "Detective Crowe, here's your Simmons file. Vince, my updates to the airport murders from last month. I have my final notes on the Bergen couple for Frost; here you go. And, saving the best for last, Trovosky for Jane."

"Thanks," Jane gave her a warm smile as she plucked the folder from the doctor's hand. "Hey," there was twinkle of mischief in the detective's eyes, "the next time you decide to steal something from me, could you warn me first?" She winked at Maura's retreating form, smirking as she remembered their conversation the night before where she had mutter the forever corny line about Maura stealing her heart.

Maura whipped back around; she'd been on her way to the break table for a cup of tea, but this was more important. Shock flashed across her features, but was quickly replaced by mischief as she saw her opening. "Why, so you can arrest me? I thought you didn't like to use the cuffs."

Low voices quietly offered their input in a discordant, "OooooOOOOOooooh" from multiple points throughout the bullpen, detectives and visiting uniformed officers alike.

The shocked look on Jane's face was all too quickly replaced with one showing the challenge had been accepted. She shrugged. "No, I said I didn't like using the cuffs on just _anyone_. That's something you have to earn. Why? You volunteering?" Her smirk broadened. "Think you got what it takes?"

"Oh my God," Frost croaked out between laughs. "The mental pictures."

"Yeah," Korsak added jovially, "It's like you guys aren't even trying anymore." Truth be told, the grizzly bear of a sergeant was long past the point at which he actually thought anything of all the teasing he gave his former partner over her friendship with the weird medical examiner, long past the point at which he remembered that Maura was weird (most of the time). It was just a habit. An entertaining habit, but still, just friendly ribbing.

Still smiling, Maura tilted her head to muse aloud, "You know, Vince, you're right. It _has_ been a while since Jane shut any of you out, hasn't it?"

"That's not how you say that. It's 'shut you down', and I figured it was kind of pointless," Jane shrugged. "Besides, I think you're just trying to avoid the question, Dr. Isles. Clearly, my handcuffs are too much for you handle." Her smirk turned into a full-fledged grin.

"Really? Oh man, you two are just too much sometimes, I swear," Frost shook his head as he sipped his coffee.

Laughingly, Maura walked over to Jane's desk and leaned over, hugging Jane's shoulders from behind. "I agree, Barry. Honestly, Jane! Do you think that's appropriate workplace conversation?" Still she smiled as she went to give the taller woman a friendly kiss on the cheek.

Slowly, detectives' and unis' attention swayed towards their comrade-in-arms and Jane's... well, the woman they'd always called her girlfriend behind Jane's back and occasionally to her face. They'd all seen the hugs, the touches, the too-warm smiles, flirty banter. Sure, they knew girls could get away with stuff that guys couldn't, but those two took it to a whole different level. Or maybe that was how their own wives or girlfriends acted towards each other when the men weren't there. Frankie, still assigned to shadow Korsak, spoke up after clearing his throat. "Yeah, Janie, Maura, you don't want any of the guys getting the wrong idea."

Maura stood upright again, but didn't go far, choosing to seat herself at the corner of Jane's desk with one foot on the floor and the other leg bent. "What wrong idea is that?" she asked plainly. Someone muttered the word clueless.

"You know," Frost explained. "I mean, we all know you two are real close friends, and it's great. It's great. But sometimes you sort of make it sound like you're a little bit more than that."

"Oh, well, we are," Maura replied with a bright, happy smile. "We're LLBFFs."

"You still owe me for that, by the way," Jane said as she started flipping through the file. "I _told_ you to leave Giovanni alone. But, do you listen to me? No, of course not. I've only known the guy most of my life." She rolled her eyes. "Speaking of – Hey, Frankie, Ma get that racing stripe off the car yet? She was supposed to do that today, said you were taking the car in to Giovanni to get it done."

"Yeah," Frankie responded, chin jerking upward in a quick guy-nod, since guy-topics were being discussed. "She took it in today, and I'm supposed to take her in whenever she goes to pick it up. Hey, what's an LLBFF, and does that have anything to do with why Giovanni kept telling me to remind you two to call him if you changed your minds?"

Maura suppressed a smile until it turned into a chuckle, then just let it happen. "LLBFF is a Life-Long Best Friend Forever. I know it's redundant, but it was all we could come up with on the spot."

"Worked, though." Jane held up an x-ray of an arm fracture to the overhead light. "Ouch." She frowned, set the x-ray down, and continued to look at the file. "But he can just keep dreaming because that's _never_ going to happen." She gave a little shiver, looking up at Maura, who was still sitting on the corner of the detective's desk. "I can't believe you were thinking of sleeping with Grease Monkey Boy. Ew." She shook her head. "Every time I think about it I want to vomit."

Frankie's eyes bugged. "You were going to sleep with _him_?" No one answered.

"I'm sorry, sweetie," Maura replied to Jane, sounding actually apologetic, though not at all ashamed of the choice she'd almost made. "But thank you for saving me from it."

Again, Frankie expressed astonishment, this time by dropping his jaw. "You actually got Giovanni to lay off of you? How? Nobody ever gets that guy to give up!"

"We told him we batted for the other team," his sister said matter-of-factly as she gave a very hard look to a very complicated chart. "He offered a threesome, but I'd rather poke my eyes out with rusty nails than even think about… oh man, see? Now I have mental picture of a naked and horny Giovanni in my head. Gross. You totally owe me something for that, Frankie, and you," she threw her gaze back to Maura, "are welcome. You know I'm here for you, sweetheart." She scrunched her face up, making an unpleasant sound in the back of her throat. "Naked Giovanni... Ugh. Not. Enough. Brain. Bleach."

Maura rolled her eyes and gave Jane a playful swat on the arm. "Oh, hush. He's very physically attractive. He just shouldn't speak at all. Well, except that if he hadn't spoken, I wouldn't have found out in time that he wanted to lick my face, so I suppose the warning is something I should appreciate. But don't worry, Jane. I promise I don't want him anymore."

Jane gave a quick glance up from the chart, raising an eyebrow and smirking before going back to the papers.

"Wait, that guy offered you a threesome?" Vince asked, getting back to what he considered the essentials. That was hot. Not that he'd say so out loud.

"He did," confirmed the honey-haired beauty on Jane's desk, shifting a little for comfort as her skirt rode infinitesimally upward on her thighs.

Frankie looked impressed. "Seriously, you told him that, Janie? Man. Guys talk, you know. He's going to have the whole neighborhood thinking you two are... dating. I thought you hated it when people said that." He turned next to Maura, surprise heaping atop surprise. "And I thought you couldn't lie!"

Maura glanced at Jane. "That's right, I can't," she said placidly.

Most of Jane's attention was on the file she was now hunched over. Both elbows on her desk, forehead resting in her hands, and face contorted into a grimace, she was reading handwritten letters from the victim to one of the suspects. "This guy's handwriting is worse than mine," she grumbled. Glancing up, she shrugged. "We didn't lie. _He_ asked if we batted for the other team. _I_ said yes, and Maura just smiled. He can think whatever he wants. I don't really care." She went back to the letter she was trying to decipher. "That either says, 'I've loved you for ages' or 'I've lived you for apes.' God, this sucks." She picked the paper up and held it closer to her face.

Watching Jane fondly as the detective went over the case file, Maura sighed in contentment. "It's probably _loved you for ages_," she suggested, but her mind wasn't really on the page. "All right, I guess that's enough of a break for me. I'm going to go back down to the morgue and begin the Yamamoto autopsy. This is your case, Jane, and I know you always want to be there for your victims. See you in about twenty minutes, baby?"

"Yeah, sure, sweetheart. I'll be there in," she gave a quick look at her watch, "twenty. You want to do dinner after while stuff's processing? I'm going to need a break after going through this," she held up the paper in her hand. Sighing, she went back to it. "I'm pretty sure this says, 'I've loved you for ages, and I'm sorry I never," she leaned forward, squinting as if that would help decipher the handwriting, "_something_. Then there's a bunch of stuff that I _think_ are more words, then it says, 'afraid we might be found out, and I'm sorry I can't… _something_," she shook her head in frustration. "Seriously? Man, why couldn't he just tell this Jackson guy that he wanted to hook up instead of waxing poetic about wanting to hook up but not being able to because they might be found out? _Who cares?_ God, people make life so freaking complicated sometimes." She grunted, rolling her eyes, and setting the letter down. "Just say it. What's so hard about that? Then, I wouldn't have to sit here and try to read this God awful handwriting."

"Oh, give it," Maura said with a tolerant laugh as she plucked the page right out of Jane's hands. "It says: Dear Jackson. I've loved you for ages, and I'm sorry I never had the courage to live with that. I've always been afraid we might be found out, and I'm sorry I can't – Oh, no, it says _couldn't_– risk public discovery. This will destroy my relationship with my family, but nevertheless, it's time for me to say that I'm ready now." She looked up from the paper for a long moment, then back down as her voice became quiet and whispery. "I'm ready to be yours if you're still willing to be mine. I don't fear exposure anymore. Let me be with you honestly. All my love, Toby." She sniffled, ducking her head as she handed the page back to Jane and reached for a tissue. "Jane?"

Letting the paper hit the desk, Jane stood and placed a reassuring hand on Maura's arm. "Hey, it's okay." She gave a little squeeze.

"I think we should just tell them... babe."

"You… you do?" Jane dropped her voice so the others had a harder time hearing her. "Are you sure?"

Frankie was already grinning. "Aw, sis," he said... to Maura, and then just cleared his throat to macho up his voice a bit. "You don't have to say anything. Teddy told me." Maura looked surprised until he went on to explain, "I knew he wouldn't come down off that shelf until Janie wanted to pass him on."

Maura glanced around at the detectives, who had long since given up pretense of having better, or at least, work-related things to do in their vicinity. "Well, maybe it's not really necessary," she said with a smile that was almost as brave as she wanted it to be. "You work with detectives."

"I keep _trying_ to tell you." Jane gave Maura a gentle smile as she let go to return to her chair. "Take a look around, Maura. No one here is anything but supportive. We're a family in this department, and you know what that means." She sighed, picking up the letter up again as she started to sit down.

Before Jane could sit fully down, though, Maura stood to intercept her. "Yes. It means I'll never live down the fact that I thought we weren't out all along," she said as, with rapidly diminishing trepidation, she grasped the front of Jane's belt to pull her closer for a kiss. It was not a scorching volcano; those she saved for more private settings. It was just a comfortable, warm connection, barely more than an embrace, except that it involved lips instead of only arms. The two stood flush against one another for several seconds.

"Oh, and Jane?" Her voice lowered so that this time, the words were only audible to her lover. "If you were serious about using the cuffs... _bring it._I dare you to see just how much I trust you."

Then Maura let go, backed up a step, and added cheerfully, "See you downstairs in twenty for the Yamamoto autopsy."

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